Wife: Oh, good gracious! A tick!
(gets tweezers, removes tick, flushes it)
7 seconds later finishes
applying makeup, gets dressed and starts
writing before work in her favorite chair
***********
Husband: (hollers from shower)
Can you come here?
I need you to look at something!
Wife: (hollers back) I’m not falling for that again.
Husband: No, seriously.
I think I have a tick.
Wife: I’ll be there when you get out.
Husband: (parading into living room
towel wrapped around his waist,
still half-wet, hair every whichaway,
pointing just under his left nipple)
No wonder I’ve been itching since
we got home from camping!
Wife: Are you sure it’s a tick? It’s
embedded deep. It’s not a mole?
Husband: I don’t think so.
Do you have tweezers?
Wife: Yes, I’ll get them.
(brings them from makeup bag)
Husband: Here, you try! (hands tweezers back)
Wife: (rolling eyes)
Husband: Well, I can’t see that angle
Wife: There’s a mirror right
behind you (digging at embedded
tick, husband wincing)
Husband: Here, let me try
(takes tweezers)
Wait, do you have different
tweezers? These aren’t lining up right.
Wife: (goes and looks for another pair
brings them back 3 minutes later)
Husband: (still digging) I got part of it
Wife: The head is still in there.
Husband: I’ll dig that out later. I’m
going to be late for work…..
(dresses, kisses her, grabs coffee, leaves for work)
Wife returns to chair to finish writing
<writes: Ticks ~ Husband vs. Wife>
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