Save the Lions!
In my dream, I adopted a lioness. We had moved to a village where the next-door neighbor fostered rescue lions and made home placements. She chose us as parents of a half-starved but playful adult cat who spent most of her time on her back baring her sharp teeth, twitching her dustwand-tipped tail, and begging us to scratch her belly. We were enjoying our new family feline when panic suddenly gripped me full-force.
What have I done? Is this legal? Can we even afford to feed her?
Oh God, she’ll eat our dogs!
We set off to see the lion veterinarian (yes, there actually was one in this strange town) to seek advice on what to do to fix our error. I was already making a list of zoos to contact about making a live donation if the vet didn’t pan out.
In dreams, nothing seems out of the ordinary, so we were not surprised that when we stepped inside the office we had to put our lioness in a Walt Disney World-style It’s A Small World boat and ride with her back to the veterinarian’s exam room. Thank God they didn’t play the music. She turned onto her back in the boat, pawing at us to scratch her belly as we floated past a mixed pride of lions all lined up along the wall awaiting their own appointments.
Halfway there, I jolted awake and was relieved to begin the day lionless once I got my bearings and realized it was all just a bad dream and decided that perhaps I should quit with the creme de menthe shots before bed. As I was getting dressed, my husband asked what had me all jumpy this morning. I shared my dream with him as he stood before me with his towel around his waist, smelling of a pleasant blend of Lever 2000 and Head and Shoulders. Before turning on the hairdryer, he thought deeply for a moment and then replied, “Hmm…..2021 might be better with a lion. We might shoulda kept her.”